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The End of My College Career [Feb. 4th, 2008|11:49 pm]
[Current Location |My living room]
[Current Mood |tiredtired]
[Current Music |My roommates voices while they study for an exam]

here I am. Sitting on the futon in my apartment that I live in with my two roommates, looking back on some of my most recent entries onto this page. One thing that I realize is that I am almost done. I have come so far (farther than I even realized up till this moment) and even though i have still so far to go, I have made footprints in the ground, and i do hve evidence of the journey. Sorry to be all semi-deep with my words, but it's just been such a long, and short, past four years. I look at old pictures of me and they make me laugh. Although to any random person looking at my old pictures I probably look the same as i did when i got to school, but when I look at these photos I see the changes that i have made in myself, I see the different experiences that i went through at these different points. That's why i love photography-- it takes you back to a specific point in your life, and you can see the entire story that went on behind the photo. Anyway, back to the future........................

I am sitting here, on my couch, across from my two roomates, and I am just thinking, "This is what it's going to be like in 6 months." In 6 months, if all goes well, I will be out of school with a bachelor's in business marketing, living in this same apartment, but either witha job or looking for a job like a crackhead who lost his crackrock. but I am not even going to focus on that, because I am too busy staying happy with everything else to worry about such trivial things as a career or financial stability. I know that I should be worried about that, but I think that now that i am actually starting to get to know myself, I am realizing that there is an actual possibility other than pursuing a job in corporate America. I am finally admitting to myself that I am not going to have a job in corporate America. If I do get a job in marketing, I would like for it to be in a job for a nonprofit organization or a moderately small marketing or advertising firm in the DC area. I am almost positive that I want to stay in DC at least for the next 5 years, as long as there is not a ridiculous shift in the crime of DC, because a bitch is not trying to get trapped in a gang war walking up to my front door.

Ok, now on another note, I really love my apartment. I mean, my room is kindof small, but the living room is really big, and everything is new and modern. However, there are definitely some drawbacks. Number one, it is across from a 24 hour gas station, #2, our next door neighbors are "that family on the block" that always has people coming in and out of their house and they are wild as shit, #3, there is like noooo soundproofing between our apt and the apt upstairs, so walking, fucking, and just going up the stairs sounds like amplified in our apartment. Now for me, fucking is the only one of those noises that is excusable to me. Good sex should not be muffled. But for the other shit, we need to buy our neighbors a full size rug to cover their apartment. #4, I think that our landlord is a robot......., and #5 I have to take the bus to school, with all of the crazies and the smellies. However, on the plus side, it is on the Northwest part of DC (if you know anything about DC life, you'll understand why that's a benefit), the bus that stops by my apt goes most places that I need to go to, like school or DuPont Circle and such to hang out or shop. As many problems as DC has, there is alot of beauty here. And there are shitloads of eye candy of every type everywhere you go.

Wow, I drank my vanilla soy chai from starbucks and now i can barely stay awake, caffeine just fucks me up. too tired to go on, finish this tomorrow....
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Hurting Like a BITCH [Jul. 25th, 2007|05:18 pm]
[Current Location |the couch]
[Current Mood |soreswollen]
[Current Music |movie soundtracks]

i got my wisdom teeth taken out yesterday morning......all four......my jaws are swollen like marlon brando in the godfather. I have been eating apple sauce, jello, and yogurt. I would kill for a steak and lobster dinner........ On the plus side, they put me on Oxycodone......hehehehe....... So i have been resting on the couch battling nausea and fatigue since then, so i watch movies and tv all day. I am starting to prepare myself to go back to school, but i still have no housing to speak of, had to take out the more loan money than i did in any of the past years, and have a pretty shitty class schedule. But i am not gonna sit here and mope, especially not when i have oxycodone.
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Almost forgot!!!!!! [Feb. 14th, 2007|10:50 pm]
ON A LIGHTER NOTE, MAY EVERYONE'S V.D. BE ONE WITH LOTS OF SHARING! Happy Valentine's Day everyone, be sure to get tested tomorrow............ kisses!
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(no subject) [Oct. 26th, 2005|05:00 pm]
I feel like Carrie Bradshaw in Season 5 of Sex and the City. If you watch the show and are slightly addicted like myself, you will know what i mean. If you don't, ask someone who knows.....love you guys.....
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A weekend that will live in infamy........... [Oct. 17th, 2005|11:14 am]
[Current Mood |happyhappy]
[Current Music |Summer Breeze - Isley Brothers]

Hello to anyone who's reading this!! I know that it's been a long time, but between trying to not fail out of the school of business and have a job at the same time, I haven't had alot of time to update. but for once, I actually have a free moment and have the energy to make an entry. This past weekend was definitely one the best weekends that i have ever had, maybe the best. I dunno if i ever mentioned my friend lance on this thing, but he's a transfer student from Houston, Texas (but he's actually not all "Don't mess with texas" like all the other texans here) and on Friday his ex-boyfriend/ gonna be boyfriend again came to spend the night with him and we took him around the neighborhood that we live in, and he was a really cool guy and fun to hang out with, and just had a good time trying to find a liquor store that was wtill open at one, which we couldn't find. Then on Saturday, me, Lance, and Steven just hung out in the neighborhood. Ok, lemme just say that I LOVE the area that my dorm is in this year, ok? it's called Adams-Morgan, and it's just really pretty and nice. Like there are alot of restaurants and things to do, and the bus that i take to my job stops right in front of my dorm. There's a park across the street, and it has these beautiful fountains and people are always playing soccer or something, and it's really photogenic and I have a view of it from my window and i love it. We went to get something to eat at The Diner (a 24 hour big diner where most people come when they leave the club and stuff, and the waiters are pretty cute), then went to G Books, this little gay bookstore that we found, everything is really cheap, and he gives away old issues of Out and the Advocate and stuff, so it's awesome, and the guy who runs it is really cool. Like one day i was talking about how i am in love with young Marlon Brando, and he was talking about how he would always make himself semi hard before a scene in his films and stuff to make the bulge in his pants. And he has this thick Chinese accent, and he was just like "he always play with himself, and he let men give him blowjob when he need some help, he know how to make the queer men go crazy", he's awesome. And then went and bought tickets to one of the movies for the gay and lesbian film festival movies. One of the theatres is right down the street from our dorm, so that was cool. Then, we just sat in the park taking pictures and looking at the ducks and stuff. We got these two guys to take our picture, and they had us take this really campy shot. There are so many gay people in Adams Morgan too. Then i went to work, and we were supposed to go to this gay salsa and merengue club called Fuego, but i didn''t back from work in time to go, so my friends didn't wanna go without me (awww... i love them). So on sunday, my friend Steven discovers that there's this strip club that opens at 3pm and is free before 8pm, so went there...............

*On a side note, everyone in my immediate family now knows that I am gay, and they are all ok with it! My sister Kelly 9the only one that didn't know) finally figured it out and asked my sister Ashley, and she was all like "I am just sad that you didn't think that you could tell me" and of course she told her husband, and he was totally ok with it too, and kinda hurt that he didn't think that i could tell him....i love my family....... And I keep forgetting that my sister Kelly is the like Militant "by any means neccessary" one in my family. not to say that she's all pro-black, but just about everything. So she was like "you need to tell everybody, and if they don't agree, fuck them, who gives a shit. you need to live for you and not for them." I love my family. and she's like so bold, she was the most inquisitive of anyone in my family. "Have you ever been the receiver? i'd be too afraid of boo booing on myself. So you don't like women at all? " etc, etc. But she took it very well. My sister Tiff also told mer husband so now EVERYONE in my immediate family knows. I still don't think that I am going to tell my grandparents or my aunts on my moms side, but at least i know that my whole family backs me up now. kelly told me that i have to lose this whole "i am sorry for being gay" attitude towards them finding out, because if you come off guilty, then they will persecute you, but if you come off comfortable and happy about it then they will most likely take it better. So maybe this christmas will be a very special christmas...................

Ok, so back to the strip club. We got lost trying to find it, but once we did..... it was sooo awesome! Ok, first of all we go in there, and there are like leather couches, it's very clean,a dn they are playing Disco songs and good porn (minus the water sports scenes. if you don't know what water sportsare, it's urination.....like a golden shower) and we just sat around and played pool....Until the stippers came out. Lance is 21, so we got a carona, and i after having one I have regained an appreciation for beer. So, we had that, and then one of the strippers, Pharoh, was soo awesome. The strippers in D.C. are soo nice, i was so surprised. he talked to us, and then at point it was going really slow, and he bought me and lance drinks, steven doesn't drink so he just watched. it was called a boom boom room, and it was so good, it was kalhua (sp? i can't remember), baileys and 151. They light it on fire, and it was soooo good. tasty. Then we had something called a red headed slut, that was good, kindof tasted like twizzlers. Ok, but the best part is when he let us crowd around one of the platforms, and he basically let us like do whatever we wanted besides blow him. he kept like rubbing his dick all over our faces, over, and over, again, then he like put our faces in his ass. Steven hadn't even had anything to drink and he like buried his face in Pharohs ass over and over again! it was soo much fun. Then he was telling us that for $20 you can go int he lapdance room, and what happens there stays there, and how far he goes is up to him, and he was very willing..........OMG.....Then this other guy came in, and he was like, "yeah, i am not dancing, but when i do, me and Pharoh will give yall a private show and what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas" then showed us his dick. I swear, it was totally flacid, and it would choke me, it was ENORMOUS. we were all just like stunned with out mouths open. we were like, damn! i should have saved my singles. Actually they were stevens and he just gave us all some. I swear, that is like my new favorit way to spend a sunday.

What a great weekend. I miss all my Culver peeps, and if i can get my Howard email to work, i may get a facebook account soon. Love you guys!!!
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(no subject) [Sep. 28th, 2005|10:26 am]
[Current Mood |stressedstressed]
[Current Music |Alicia Bridges - I love the nightlife]

Hey everybody who cares!

Yes, I am still aliive, and doing well, aside from school, work, and life in general. I work about 35 hours a week and still try to do homework and stuff. It is not turning out to be successful. I got a D on my first Econ exam and have an accounting exam on Friday that I am not ready for, and then I have a book report due comparing Booker T. Washington's "Up From Slavery" and W.E.B. DuBois' "The Souls of Black Folk". It is due Friday, and I am not even halfway through both of them yet. I am fucked. If I had any money to speak of then I would pull back on the hours, but I can't.

I went out and bought some Puma shoes from the Puma store in Georgetown, but those are going back. I knew that I shouldn't have bought them when I got them, so they are going back. Never choose food over shoes, even if you are a shoe queen like me :). I am sure that this entry will bore some, but I am too tired to try to be super interesting. Actually, this is the most refreshed that I have been in a few weeks. I got off at 10:30 last night, i was so happy. I wish that my parents could give me some money, or the school could give me some kind of scholarship, but they haven't, so i practivally work a fulltime job as well as go to school full time. Fun times, definitely. But I think that I am going to have to scale back the hours, because this shit is not working at all. If you want to send me something, send me a nap why don't you. I'll be sure to give a full update on how my year has been so far, probably today, because i don't work today. Peace
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Just an update [Sep. 4th, 2005|10:56 am]
[Current Mood |contemplativecontemplative]

Well, the first week is over. I have changed a few of my classes and I have been to a few places. I am enjoying my African American History class, and I am NOT enjoying my Management Information Systems class. Overall, I think that this semester will be a little hard and a little boring. I am kindof broke, and the job that I wanted to work at is a little impossible with my schedule, so I have to find a plan B. Hopefully something can come up, because my refund check will be significangtly smaller this year than it was last year. When I signed up for a room last year, they told me that I was going to be in a suite. When I got here, they told me that they ran out of suites and so i should just deal with it. That's fucked up. So now I am in this small ass room, and I am having to go and use the shower in the hallway. Fuckig bullshit. But it could be worse. Some people who put in a houseing deposit last year didn't get a room at all. The idiots at Resident Life overbooked the fucking dorms, so people were left out on the street. This school is run by autistic gorillas or something i swear to God man. it's fucked.

Anyway, I have been going to Blockbuster alot, and last night me and some of my other friends went over to my friend's Jade and Shantel's place, and we watched Jungle Fever and Def Poetry Jam, it was fun. Thursday night me and my friend Steven met up with Jean and some of her gay friends from George Washington and went to this gay club Apex since it's free for college students on Wednesday and Thrsday night. it was so much fun, i danced until like 2:30, then went back to school and went to class at 10:00. I couldn't hear right for like half of yesterday, but it was really fun, I definitely plan to go back.

My friend Steven taped the last season of Queer As Folk, so we had a marathon. I was so sad! i didn't want it to end. I am still not sure how i feel about the final episode, but it was definitely worth seeing to say the least.

I started putting stuff up in my room, but i definitely have a lot more work to do. I have my rainbow flag hanging, and pictures of young Marlon Brando and Paul Newman on the wall, along with Lenny Kravitz.

The GLBT Organization has some big plans for this year, and I am really excited about them. I made some flyers that somehow managed to get approved by the office that approves the posters. Hopefully we'll be able to get alot of the GLBT and the PFLAG to come an support BLAGOSAH this year. Lasy year we only had like 20 regular members, and we have at least over 100 openly gay people on campus, and alot came in this year, and they are like being openly affectionate all over the place. We plan to not only focus on activism, but on just being gay and the role of gay people in the school and the world. I mean yeah, I do want to get married someday and i need to make sure that it can happen, but i don't spend every minute thinking about it; sometimes i just want to find out how to put together a great outfit and go to the club and dance with a hot guy. And i think that last year we didn't focus on that enough. Hopefully some of these couples that I see walking across campus will be enticed to actually pay us a visit.

Me and my sister went out for chinese food and then she took me to see some of my relatives that lives in the area. They were really nice, but the woman has alzheimer's (sp?) disease and kept asking me the same stuff over and over again. But she was really great. I don't know what I'm going to do for the rest of the weekend, because we have Labor day off too, but I am broke, so I dunno.

My sister has been telling me that I need to tell my other sister and both of my brother's in law that I am gay, because they keep pressing her about it. They never ask me so i guess that i didn't see it as a problem, but now i guess that it is. I mean, there is no reason for me to tell them other than that they'll finally stop asking me why i don't have a girlfriend. But also my sister Tiffany said that it seems like i have alot on my mind and maybe i should go to therapy or something, and i guess that there could be a benefit to me going to therapy, but here the times and chedules of the therapists are kinda crazy unless you make an apppointment, but i guess that as long as it's free then i shouldn't care. oh well, i am sick of writing, and no one's prolly gonna read this anyway.
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(no subject) [Aug. 19th, 2005|09:44 pm]
Does anyone know the address of the service tomorrow? or the itinerary for tomorrow? Any information would be appreciated.
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I just cannot believe it [Aug. 19th, 2005|12:04 am]
I have spent the past 5 hours changing flight plans, calling people, and looking through every photo i couild find to find pictures, anything. I looked through yearbooks, and all of the camcorder tapes that I made while at Culver. Like everytime I try to realize that he is gone, I just can't. I still feel like if i go back to South Bend he'll be there. He, Christalee and her dad will pick me up from the train station, and then we'll all go hang out. I am in complete denial. I don't know what's gonna happen when I go down there.
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(no subject) [Aug. 14th, 2005|10:05 pm]
I just have to say that the show Trailer Fabulous on Mtv is fucking awesome........
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